*This time around, felt I had to delete & recreate. app was glitching like heck. idk if that’s the reason I’m getting about 5% of the messages I normally get on this site… also just noticed that somehow “degrader” got selected instead of degradee. I’m definitely a degradee, not a degrader but tbh I am a closet “firecracker” when upset that maybe some people don’t expect bc I’m chubby/allegedly, “a white girl” I don’t want to be that way.. I’m trying to change, and I get no enjoyment out of it. thing is, besides being a white girl, my mom is half southern Italian from Chicago and we’ll just leave it at: she introduced me to ptsd..she’s also 1/16 Blackfoot, Irish & Norwegian but I digress…
I’ve been to hell, and I don’t even know if I’m back yet, or if it’s like my final destination or something but I know I’m a good woman, and I’m not crazy I’m just an emotional infp with trauma from narcissistic *** with physical ***, Dx’d ptsd, anxiety; and suspected mild autism…
I was almost stupid enough recently to blow most of my *** on a tattoo of a “cheeky” orange boy cat, clawing at my heart, but common sense prevailed I guess.
my heart is broken..
the good news is this handsome “orange cat” has my heart so I can’t bother anyone else atm w wanting a relationship
but I wish I could live with a good, protective daddy and serve him in the meantime (til my heart heals, I mean, bc I doubt he’ll come back )…
If you’re a Daddy w/ an insatiable appetite,
Filtered by restraint & common sense
You’re taller than me; a gentleman,
simultaneously an Owner & a nurturer:
Maybe you can take me out on the town
and work towards placing my collar and holding
my leash?
*Newly humbled, but more confident in what I’m looking for. still love redheads. still looking for a sexy daddy who will let me pour whipped cream in his ass & eat it out.. but never jumping straight into bed, again
Must love ample curves, and a dirty mind
(not a Voyeur or a sadist);
a real Daddy/kind master/owner- with few but reasonable limits
looking for a kinky boyfriend to start out seeing 1-2 times/week.. not looking to be a toy only, not open to nsa at all. need a dom to claim me. yes, I deleted my other profile bc it was glitching & had rapidly gone downhill.
**I lost contact with some people from my previous profile: soulfulslave- it was glitching so badly, I couldn't send messages any more anyway. A few
were intentionally blocked, but there's a few wish I could still talk to.. in a way
Because honestly I am deeply, devastatingly in love w someone I met on here in Feb, who came back for a couple more rounds..and sure, I was way more in turn wrong, but it felt like he was just using me as a disposable object.. but at the same time- it didn't. he was so present when we were together. It felt like love, even if it wasn't... and I love him, even if he doesn't love me. I just wish I could serve him, I fully trusted myself in his arms, that I could die there and at least I'd "die happy."
I've never felt like that before, with the possible exception of my first love who I knew for years, and haven't seen in a very long time..
but no, the guys on here who aren't invested or present (you can be very present and attentive, even if you only want sex) or who are very attentive partners but just want to hookup/nsa, I'm not here for that so please don't reach out if that's the case. also not looking for any long distance or cyber fun